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145 | The 3 Gifts I Received on My Goddess Experience

inner goddess 2

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Four months ago the universe “offered” an opportunity for me to expand myself. I had been desiring a “reboot” and a reconnection with myself, and so I knew it was a gift, and quickly and easily jumped into the opportunity head first, believing it would benefit my soul.

This past weekend, the gift came to fruition … I went on my “Goddess Experience” (<< click the link to learn about what it is and Megan Darger, the beautiful goddess who facilitates the wonder.) – a five day retreat vacation, on the beach, in beautiful California, with 24 other amazing women.

I received a LOT of gifts this past weekend; tangible physical gifts, emotional gifts, energetic gifts. They were all beautiful and each brought me greater joy than before. These, however, are the 3 things that shine brightest, from this weekend of receiving:

  1. Connection-Remembering. This is something I had pressing on my heart for a LONG time and I FELT it this weekend. And when I say “connection” I don’t simply mean being with others. Yes, that part was epic, (and by saying it was epic, I am NOT even slightly exaggerating. I made new best friends and sisters this weekend) but for me the connection I was seeking was with my CORE. I needed to come more fully into who I REALLY am and what is seeking expression through me. And this experience gave me that more wholly than I could have imagined. // I realized more fully than I ever have before, that I am NOT alone. I am NOT separate from the energy of all things, and the only reason I ever feel as if I am, is because I am not seeing and connecting as fully as I am capable of seeing and connecting. My feelings of separation and aloneness are simply an ABSENCE of what I truly am. An ABSENCE of connection to my core. // Do you realize that we are ALL connected so wholly and fully we could NEVER be alone? Not only to each other, but to ALL things. All of nature and existence is a cooperative component in the universe. When I allow THAT energy to express through me, I too become a cooperative component. I enter into the flow with existence, and it shows me that I am one with my sisters, I am one with the trees, I am one with all people and all things and because I am, I am never alone. I am not separate. That thought or belief is a lie. // This experience brought me back home to that place where all things exist as one and I am part of that beautiful oneness. It helped me remember who I am and what I am. In that re-“member”-ing, I am whole. And I AM connection.
  2. Presence-Being. Because of the connection back into myself, I became more aware this weekend, of who I really am. What I am BEING in any moment is perfect. What expresses through me is divine. What I experience as I am present in the moment is EXACTLY what I need. Because guess what? If it’s sucky and terrible? Good! That is helping me define what I don’t love, what isn’t a desire of my heart, and it helps me refocus my awareness to the core of my being that IS whole. // When I experience an emotion that feels yucky, I can use it to help me see more clearly. I don’t have to hide from it. I don’t have to shove it down and pretend it doesn’t exist. I can use it. I can see it as a gift. I can remind myself it is there for a reason and THAT reason is divinely designed. // What is the reason? To continually remind me of coming into connection with the core of my beingness – the place of wholeness and love. // How do I do that? I see every emotion and experience as a gift. I see that the core of who I am is love and wholeness, and then I hold each moment to that energy and place. // I had a moment this weekend (more than one actually) when I felt fear. I felt real fear in being seen fully. I felt scared at the feelings of vulnerability and I felt like maybe I’m just not enough, maybe I’m just broken, maybe there’s something wrong with me. // And then, after sitting in that place for a short time I heard my inner being. And she said, “Baby, you are perfect. You are EXACTLY who you were “meant” to be. It is not wrong to be the quiet one. It is not bad to have a jiggly stomach … you carried seven children in that amazing body of yours! Honor her! It is perfect to love stillness and quiet over other things … and it is perfect because it is YOU. You ARE whole. And that doesn’t mean that deep down in there there’s a part of you that’s whole and you need to find her and be her … I am here to witness to you my dear one, that you are whole right now. Exactly as you are. You do NOT need to change. You do NOT need to be different. You are NOT broken. You are divine. You, expressing and honoring yourself fully, are a bright light in a dark world and your ONLY job is to shine that light. Your light baby, is unique. Your light my darling girl, is so uniquely yours and it is perfect and brilliant and EXACTLY what it was created to be. Do not hide, you glorious being. You OWN it.” // I breathed that presence in this weekend. I claimed it. I honored it. And I realized more than I have ever realized before, that I am ME, and I am unique, and I don’t need to judge myself at all, and I don’t need to compare my light to anyone else’s. Mine is for me, and I have a magic that no one else has. And when I own it, and truly BE it, I am home, I am whole, and I have ALL that I need. THAT is presence. That is BEING.
  3. Relaxation-Breath. I knew before this weekend that this is important. What this weekend did was remind me HOW important. I cannot express enough, how much I understand the integral importance of being “easy” about life now. // It’s not a race. It’s not a competition. There’s not a winner. There isn’t a finish line. It isn’t gravity. // It’s light. It’s easy. It’s a gift. It’s experience. It’s fun. It’s a journey. It’s a dance. It’s meant to be joyful. // Laughing, dancing, playing, enjoying, singing, BEing (and we OWNED these this weekend. It was fun and funny and we LAUGHED and danced and giggled and created and appreciated and had a blast!) … these are all things that enlarge our soul, that spark our energy, that uplift, and that heal, and that put us into a state of allowing. When we’re in a state of allowing, things go more smoothly. Pieces and parts line up in an “orchestrated” way which allows us to each be one of the cooperative components with ALL other cooperative components of the universe. Things work out. Life looks brighter. Life happens easier. Life is FUN. // Religious people call this living by “faith.” I call it “relaxing” into beingness. // It doesn’t have to be hard, it gets to be easy. It doesn’t have to be a struggle, there gets to be inspiration. It doesn’t need to be scary, we get to feel supported. // I understand now more fully, that my breathing into each new experience is what allows it to be more easily integrated into my life and more joyfully experienced. My BREATH is tied directly to my ease. My relaxing into what is here allows All That Is to inspire me to action. I don’t have to control it all. I don’t have to figure it out on my own. I don’t know all the options. But my Core being DOES know, and so I can breathe and allow HER to do the running and the jumping and the lifting. And she is STRONG. And she is CONFIDENT. And she is LIMITLESS. // Allowing that energy to come through me eases the burden, lightens the load, and makes life SO FREAKING FUN!!

The cool thing about gifts from the Universe is that they keep on giving. Over and over I receive new awareness from the experiences I experienced this weekend. And I suspect they will continue to delight and amaze me.

I honor myself more fully than I EVER have before. I hear that goddess within me saying, “Aaaaah. Yes. This is what we’ve been waiting for. Climb on my back baby and WATCH the magic begin. Are you ready? We’re going to fly and it will blow your mind. And remember my love … there is no ceiling, there is no end, this is infinite. So let’s go and light the world.”

She is me! That’s the most awesome part about this WHOLE thing! I see that the divine within me, IS me. It’s not outside of me. It’s not apart from me. It’s not something I must work at. It is the truest expression of my CORE being and it is here today, right now.

I breathe it in, I feel the alignment, it is joyfully harmoniously resonating with ALL that is and in that place, I am home. I honor the “Honor” within … and it’s about damn time.

~ honorthismoment

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