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168 | The Swirling Peace That I Love

Image by: Instagram @wonder_doodles

I’m reading a book right now that talks about finding your passion in life. And one of the things to help identify passion, is to look at what you love to do, to pay attention to the things that you WANT to do everyday, and maybe dream about those things and imagine what your perfect ideal day would be, and then use that to help you identify clearly what it is you are passionate about. What lights you up?

As I was writing in my journal the things that I love to do, and specifically clearly writing what an “ideal” day would look like for me, I noticed that a lot of the “ideal energy” in my dream day centers around how I FEEL about what I’m doing. Because my ideal day doesn’t take away what is here. I’m still the mom to seven kids. They still go to school. There still needs to be breakfasts and lunches and all of those things. (Laundry. Dishes. Etc.)

What I noticed though, about my ideal day, is that in that space, that dream-day space, I feel at PEACE with everything. It doesn’t matter what I’m doing, I am enjoying it. I am embracing it. I am focused on stillness and simplicity and presence.

So, for me, I’ve been able to clearly identify the fact that I desire more peace in my life, and I am passionate about embracing the peace and presence life can bring.

Today as I went about planning how my day has to go, and knowing that there is still school, and that my 18 year old is starting a new job today so she has to be taken to work because she doesn’t have a driver’s license, and taking her to work happens to coincide with taking the little kids to school, and so trying to figure out how to make it all work logistically, I realized that I still could create a sense of peace in this seeming chaos if I chose that. I could be intentional with the creation of the day if I so desired it.

So when I got up this morning, I made sure to get up early enough that I wouldn’t feel rushed. And I meditated so that I had time to replenish my energy before I had to start managing all the people getting to all the places they need to go. And I allowed myself time to get ready for the day so that I would feel relaxed in what shows up, not wishing that I had brushed my teeth or washed my face, but ready to easily meet whatever comes before me. I drank tea. I breathed deeply. I appreciated ponytails.

Doing this, creating space and time for preparing and intentionally choosing to honor peace in my life, actually does bring the peace. I’m not scrambling around trying to get things done when I have allowed myself enough time to do all the things that I know bring me a sense of order and flow in my life.

When you have seven kids and there are nine people to manage schedules for and all of the things that we all have to do, there has to be some semblance of order. (For me at least.)

Yes, we go with the flow. Yes, it’s hard to count on how kids are going to respond to every situation. Yes. We have learned to be flexible and allow the movement and changes life brings. And yes, sometimes we’re spontaneous and throw everything out the metaphorical window.

But yes, we keep a calendar. And yes, we try to stick to a timed schedule so that everyone gets where they need to go without being late and without worrying and stressing.

And in order for there to be peace, for me to have stillness in the storm, I must allow myself some time and care for the things I need to (want to) do to put myself in a centered place of calm clarity.

So yes, I do take time to meditate when I can. And yes, I do take time to eat breakfast knowing that if I’m not hungry I will feel better. And i take breaks. I do things alone. And yes, I try to tell all the kids ahead of time what’s going to happen so nobody has anxiety at the last minute because things are different than they expect.

We are intentional about how we create the moment, every moment. I choose to honor the fact that there’s quite a bit of anxiety in this house and having things planned out makes it less heavy. I choose to understand that things won’t always go the way it is planned, and so I know that there’s an amount of flexibility that needs to be. We get to sometimes adjust our expectations. Or maybe even get rid of our expectations completely. It’s ok for things to go askew sometimes. It’s ok for things to be adjusted. Sometimes there has to be shifts.

Like today, getting the kids to school late. There was no other way to do it. And that was ok. Being 10 minutes late for the third to last day of school is not that big of a deal. So we breathe. And the couple of kids who do get anxiety … we allowed them to have their moment. And it was all ok.

When the sun goes down, and the people are in their beds, and I sit in the house in the quiet of the evening, I look around at the life that I have here and I am amazed that it all runs as smoothly as it does. I am not a magical organizer. I don’t have it all figured out. It is not always perfect. There are frequently moments of complete and utter chaos …

… But, somehow we’re all alive. Somehow we all get where we need to go. Somehow we manage to make it work. And we have fun. An we love each other. And in the midst of all that is going on, there is this beautiful lovely stillness that I can intentionally choose to step into. And it creates a sense of peace, that energy that I appreciate and desire. And it is the kind of peace that resides wholly in that day of dreamy “idealness” that I like to imagine. It is here in little moments.

The key, then, to creating more lovely days is to just grasp those little moments of peace when they come, and allow them to swirl and circle around me. Breathe life into those moments. And maybe they will come more frequently and they will gain momentum and I will eventually have so many moments of peace that my day will look exactly like that day I dream about in my “ideal” visualization.

It is about feeling into the energy and embracing it fully.

May YOU identify many moments of peace in your day. And may you breathe life into those moments so they infuse your day with lovely energy.

May it be.


(Image: IG @wonder_doodles)

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